Thursday, March 6, 2008

A letter to Dawn's Mom

It seems so weird to say mommy after all God felt the need to take you to make me who I am today. It's been almost 20 years since your death. I think about you everyday. At first it was I forgot your voice and then it was I forgot the way your hands looked then it was the little laugh lines you had where the placement was and if I they look like mine now. I hope you are proud of me mommy. I have tried the best I know how in life and you didn't make it easy but I knew that Grandma and you were watching me and protecting me in those moments of loneness. I am so lucky to have known such a corky, fun and lovable person in such a short time. I thought about you a lot at night and if you could hear me when I spoke to you in my bed. I wanted to make daddy and you very proud of me always. I do miss daddy terrible I know it was hard for you after daddy died I saw that you just couldn't be without him. I am who I am today because of you. The day I graduated high school is the day
I was going to stop being anger at you for leaving and realized that you were shaping me to be who I am today. I felt so alone with my two little ribbons. Everyones family was there to cheer them on and in the stands was my friends whom where as close as a family I had. I know you were differently watching over me in Florida and you really worked over time. I have your sense of humor I think and that corky personality. Mom I bet you were so happy when your granddaughter Zoe came along. I wondered what you said about her and how much she looked like me. When Cole came around I knew you would be proud to have such a handsome boy. I talk about you to them all the time. I show them pictures of you and talk about the crazy dance sessions in our living room SOLID GOLD SATURDAY NIGHT. I want you to know that I know if you would've known what was going to happen to me at Rey and Pauline's you would have never sent me there. I know that broke your heart. I miss you everyday and
try not to think of you on the days I need you the most but its only to get me by on those days. I love you and miss you everyday I am a grateful to have known you.
Dawn Rhodes

1 comment:

Tahnner said...

Big hugs! I know how lonely you must feel without your mother. I pray that with these lovely letters; your children will learn all about grandmother and your childhood! The letters are brilliant!